VPC 2013

Guess what, Internet. I love combining music making with competition!

VPC 2013
Only Nerdcore Now could put on a competition that will pit Adam Warrock against Random against YTCracker against Death*Star again Beef Muthafuckin’ Thompson, but that is exactly what is happening with the Vocalist Producer Challange 2013. Starting January 4th, rappers will team up with a single producer and create tracks based on a changing round-by-round challenge. The community votes as well as being graded based on the criteria of any given round. Any team of two can enter. I’ve teamed with longtime internet homie and Nerdcore Meow co-host Beaker. Vince Vandal is joining forces with Warrock. K-Murdock & Random will continue their Forever Famicon flavor stylings. Benjamin Bear is producing for Hairetsu. Superpowerless has embraced MC Wreckshin. Project Zero has snared YT. The biggest question is what big name will announce their involvement next?! The beauty to me is that there are the relative well known names I’ve mentions, but there are also a slew of “underground” acts still scratching the surface and primed to enter both your ears and your hearts.

If you’re interested check out the announcement at NerdcoreNow.com and if you want people to tremble but sure to announce your team on this forum thread. I’m excited to work with Beaker for the first time and to discover a slew of new artists. I’ll be sure to keep you posted when new hotness is up for your ear holes.

-love beefy

Bowling For Shiva: A Tribute To The League

A bunch of months ago, Rusty Shackles approached me about working on a project together. I assumed he wanted to draw me in the nude. Instead, we realized, over twitter, that our love for The League combined with his dope art skills and my “ehhh” rap skills combined with the tireless efforts of our friends could result in a fun EP. This is that EP! Since you’re likely a fan of nerdcore, you’re probably not that aware of the world of sports in general, making a show like The League not something that would normally jump out at you. Quickly smack yourself in the mouth, boot up Netflix, and shotgun season 1. Do it. It’s only a few episodes and it is really excellent. This album isn’t like the music shown on the show. I don’t make hilarious Taco songs. I do my thing. I try to get into the skin of my favorite characters and try to figure out what they might say if they were rappers. This is my homage to a terrific piece of pop culture that, frankly, is only now getting a fraction of the love it deserves. Welcome to Bowling For Shiva: A Tribute To The League. A Rusty Shackles Joint.

This album is in no way affiliated with The League, FX, FOX, NFL, DJ Khaled, or any other company/artist/actor/performer/producer/ect (though we are open to it) and we beg you kindly not to sue us! Thanks

Bowling For Shiva
A Tribute To The League
A Rusty Shackles Joint
[download .rar 45mb]
1. Shivablast
2. On The Clock
3. Taco Corp
4. Lineup Nirvana
6. Fantasy

The Crew

Rusty Shackles
Brains behind the operation, Artist

Vince Vandal
Music for On The Clock, Fantasy

DJ Empirical
Music for Shivablast

Mikal kHill
Music for RAFIBOMB

Rapper, “Producer”

Blog Raps [090612]

Salutations Internet! Missed you! I heard that you’ve been talking to Z over at Radio Free Hipster. It’s cool. I’m cool. Whatever. We always knew this wasn’t exclusive. So, yeah. I barely care. Whatever. Good for you two.

I can’t blog from my iPhone. Yes, physically I can post a blog from my phone, but these sausage fingers of mine cannot function on a touch screen. I just end up leaving out valuable adjectives and all together skip most grammatical normalcy. It’s the biggest first world problem I face on a nightly basis. Weep for me. So, that being said, I had a lot I wanted to say about the last few weeks, I needed something to record in my new computer area, and I felt too much time had passed for me to do justice to the experiences through prose. I opted instead to write rhymes. These are those rhymes. I hope you enjoy!

Production: Kool Keith – The God of Rap Dr. Dooom 2

-love beef

AICN and chris

Hey there blog, it’s me again. Let’s see if I can come up with anything to update you with.

I’m a fan of films almost as much as I’m a fan of film rumors, spoilers, and gossip. Because of this one of my daily visits is Ain’t It Cool News, and the other day they reviewed the nerdcore documentary that came out like 4 years ago, Nerdcore For Life. I may have mentioned that film on this site once or twice in the past. The review was written by Jon Doe as part of a series called “Hurts So Good”, not because the movie was bad, but because our music is so bad that it does a 180 and turns out to be good. I guess. The music I was making when the doc was filmed was rather on the bad side back then, so I’m going to let it slide… this time. In all honesty though the write up was really awesome and hopefully will lead to some more people checking out the flick. Also, Doe said I was his favorite person in the flick. I cheated though, to be fair. I did my interviews from a hot tub. Any documentary subject becomes the favorite once he/she speaks from their heart from within a hot tub. Seriously though, my nerd boner is super huge because of this. I love AICN and thought the closest I would ever come to gracing their pages was if I was mocked for my appearance in Nerdcore Rising. Go peep game at the article and let me know whatcha think.

Hey! You want to read a few paragraphs that will keep me from ever touring with the man who was my hero and reason for trying to be a better performer and nerdcore rapper? Too bad! I’m writing it anyways!

Is anyone out there surprised that mc chris has yet again done something to alienate new fans and challenge those loyal to him to stay his fans? I submit that mc chris fans spend more time defending him online than singing his praises. This newest episode involves chris kicking out a fan from his show for a tweet the fan made in regards to chris’ opening act. The fan didn’t go on a rant. He didn’t use foul language or slurs. He simply tweeted, “Dear nerd rapper opening for Powerglove/mc chris. You’re not good enough to pander to me. Better luck next time.” mc chris felt that Richie Branson was more than capable of pandering to the fan, so he jumped on stage, found the fan in the crowd, and demanded that he get kicked out of the event. Being that this was an mc chris show, chances are extremely high that he went on to bad mouth said fan for a while after the incident. That last part is speculation since I wasn’t at this show, but I’ve been to at least 3 other shows where chris kicked someone out and spent the rest of the night boasting. Now, I don’t know Richie Branson. I’m sure he’s a terrific guy doing very well musically. He must be if he’s touring with chris. But is it just me, or do you also feel that if anyone should have gotten upset and had a right to overreact, it should have been Richie?

My problem with the entire event isn’t that mc chris overreacted and was an asshole to a fan expressing his opinion regarding the talents of chris’ friends. My problem is that he only felt bad about it after that fan took to reddit, explained his side of the story, and unleashed the well deserved backlash upon chris. Before reddit joined in, chris continued to badmouth the dude on twitter and facebook. The fan has, what?, like a max of 1,000 followers? Chris has easily 20 times that on twitter alone. So not only did he kick the kid out of the show, a kid who until the other night was likely a huge mc chris fan, but then he proceeded to blame the kid for the backlash he received as a result of it. Because only the fan’s close and personal friends could possibly have a problem with what chris did, right?

Cut to the reddit backlash, which spreads to chris’ facebook and twitter pages (and to a twitter account not even owned by the nerd rapper), and suddenly chris has a change of heart and decides that what he did was in fact wrong and stupid, and posts a teary eyed vid on youtube. This is not the first time this has happened. This won’t be the last time it happens either. This fan’s only crime was speaking his mind to his followers about a rapper he felt pandered more than performed and didn’t reach the level of entertainment he found in mc chris. Do you think it’s at all possible that if one were to search through the archives of chris’ posts and tweets that a person could find an example or two of mc chris expressing negative opinions about something? Is it possible the target of those negative comments also had friends who wouldn’t take kindly to it? But it’s ok when mc chris does it. He’s chris. Do you know how many MySpace friends he has? He’s told you a million times. His tweet followers number into the bajillions. He made thousands of dollars from fans to make his very own cartoon. He raises money for cystic fibrosis for crying out loud. How could a person like that be the bad guy? The fan was just some fan. Chris has plenty of those. One less won’t kill him, I guess. Of all the acts in the nerd scene, I’ve never seen any performer treat their fans with more vitriol, disdain, or impatience than mc chris seems to. Maybe that’s just because he has more, but I’ve never seen even a portion of that kind of behavior from guys like Front, Lars, or YT on their worst days. Not that Lars has “worst days.” Even on horrible days Lars will smile. He’s my hope for America.

I’m not calling chris a monster. I’m not saying he’s evil through and through and you should set fire to all of the mc chris merch you can find. I’m just saying that this is just another in a looong line of examples of mc chris being an asshole to the fanbase that made him. He became famous rapping about feeling like an outcast, being bullied, and not feeling comfortable with other people, then he proceeds to outcast, bully, and alienate kids at his shows for not doing things how mc chris decides they should be done. How is that not like the high school bully? He has the power now and he sure as hell is going to let you know about it if you step out of line. I’m glad mc chris came to his senses and decided to finally do the right thing and apologized to the kid. My question, however, is what will chris be apologizing for next? Odds are we won’t have to wait long to find out.

Love, beef.

Keithy Keithy He’s So Beefy

Guess what, Internet? I was in a music video! A long while back while I was in Chicago I met up with Ben of the Former Fat Boys and we shot some footage for the track we’d done with YT and Lars. Cut ahead what feels like a million years and Revenge of the Nerds is out and it looks incredible. You see that spaceship? That’s next level stuff right there.

Also, I asked my beautiful girlfriend Chandra to marry me. Yeah, that’s right. Lil’ ol’ can’t get a girlfriend Beefy is going to have a wife. Ain’t that some shit? It is. So what better way to congradulate the two of us then by buying a new shirt for your body? My thoughts exactly!

Gonna Get Hitched

I put a ring on it. Like that songs says. ORIGINAL!

Didn’t See That Coming, Didja?!

Good! Because neither did I. It has been announced today that I’ll be traveling to Baltimore on March 16th to perform at the latest thrilling installment of Super Art Fight! I will mostly be there to root on my friend and With Sprinkles cover artist Brandon J. Carr as he defends his title Super Art Fight World Title against Jamie “Brawlin’” Baldwin! Did I mention that PAX Headliners, Da Vinci’s Notebook members, Jonathan Coulton cruisers, morning show radio regulars Paul & Storm will also be performing? Because that is also happening. It is happening in a very big way. As you are well aware, it is a rare occasion when I leave the comforts of my beloved Northwest, so if you can make it out to The Ottobar this March I suggest you attempt to do so. My hugs await you, traveler.

This news should in no way overshadow the fact that I am also performing next month, Feb 17-19, at Radcon in my hometown of Pasco, WA. I should let you know now that I am not in fact performing all three days, but rather I’m just unaware of when exactly I am performing. I am sure that there is efforting to get that information as we speak. I know I’m excited to go home and perform for you again Tri-Cities. I hope you can make it out!

Yesterday Stevie D of The Illbotz released his debut single for his new solo album featuring myself and (surprise, surprise) Adam Warrock called “Best Damn Fuckin’ Rappers In The Universe.” I just want to add this disclaimer: I do not, at all, find the title of this song to be in any way any kind of form of hyperbole. It’s the hard, honest truth. 2Pac? Pffft. Biggie? Please. Kool Keith? Nice try, other Keith. Obviously Stevie D, Warrock, and myself deserve to be put on some sort of rap Rushmore where we act as a hip-hop tribunal that judges lesser rappers. Poor rappers. Witness this song via YouTube, and if you’d like you may also download it for free over at bandcamp. Stevie raps circles around you. I talk about bow ties. If Adam isn’t the best then he’s your favorite. Yeah he is. I’d also like to mention the wonderful art provided by Rusty Shackles. How bad ass do I look? The answer: very.

Bang Biscuit

Sure, you might have blacked out your website to protest SOPA and PIPA, but I haven’t updated my site since October because I REALLY CARE.

Twitter has made me grow lazy as a writer. I wasn’t exactly Shakespeare to begin with, but there was at least a time in my life when I could keep a regular blog. Now if it’s more than 140 characters I can’t be bothered. There were days when we held iron man blogging competitions, which of course is the laziest form of competition, but a competition nonetheless. It seems like I can hear myself thinking, “Sure, you could open up Word and attempt to express very complex thoughts with your limited vocabulary… OR you could surf Reddit for a few hours then watch Doctor Who and take a nap on the couch!” And I always always always choose the nap. Napping means you’re better than other people because while other people are at work or at school or are otherwise being responsible, you’ve decided that you are entitled to some midday sleep on top of what you slept the night before and will sleep in the coming hours. And in the mind of one Beef Thompson, those options, regardless of how self-fulfilling and nonproductive they are, far outweigh the “joy” I get out of blogging. Not the opening paragraph of course. The opening paragraph is the milk chocolate bottom of my ice cream drum stick. It’s the parts below with their information and opinion that always get me down. Because I’m forced to remember those times I said, “Oh man, I have to add that to the blog.” Fat chase of that, buddy. So we’ll deal with the bigger fish and see what eventually follows.

The other day I joined the boys of Nerdcore Meow for their eleventh episode and subsequent After Hours podcasts. We discuss music new and old as well as topics you should not discuss with your grandparents. Unless you have some down ass grandparents. I like Nerdcore Meow because it reminds me of hanging out and recording with Jones McFly when we were doing regular updates of Just Another Lazy Podcast. Like JALP, podcasting about the nerdcore scene kind of pushes you right to the forefront of the community. I like it because it keeps me up to date on the goings-on on the nerdcore forums as well as letting me hear from MCs I enjoy like Billy The Fridge and Klopfenpop. Also on this podcast, I debuted a brand new song that will be on my eventual solo album. How could you not want to listen to it now?

The chances that you have heard of, let alone regularly listen to, The Dan Patrick Show is pretty slim to none. However, with my graveyard shift, the DP Show has become part of my Monday thru Friday routine. And because I write songs about things I really really enjoy, I wrote a track about Dan and the Danettes. You can catch the show on the Audience Network on Directv as well as various Root Sports stations, or hear the radio broadcast on various Fox Sports radio affiliates from 6-9am PST. Again, being as how you are reading the blog post of a nerdcore rapper, you probably aren’t huge into sports talk radio and thus will not really enjoy the track, but maybe you just like my voice and flow and also enjoy the wonderful beat making of the wonderful c64 of Dual Core.

The other day I was thinking to myself, “Self, how can I mercilessly destroy a terrible rapper while simultaneously teaching others about how to be a better rapper?” Thankfully my good friend Swagberg completed that very task with this informative and hilarious video aimed at a wayward Bronie. Swagberg, who performs under several different monikers, is in my top 5 of people who I envy in regards to their considerable talent. As the video implies, homedude knows his shit. He’s not a shit-talker like I was a shit-talker because he can actually back it up. When I was ripping into Ham-Star and MC Wreckshin I wasn’t exactly being confused with Big Pun due to my abilities. Unrelated: You should go download Kabuto’s The Kvetch Sessions.

In Beefy music news, the Grammar Club just scored a huge get in regards to featured artists. I would tell you, but then you might not buy the album. Granted, the album will be released for free on the Creative Commons license, but I still demand your surprise! At first Shael and I had discussed doing maybe a 6 song EP, but we have since moved on to an album length feature. The biggest hold up, like every other project I’m on, is me and my lack of recording. That will hopefully take care of itself. I assume through some kind of voodoo magic. I will be featured on upcoming albums from Adam Warrock, Ultraklystron, Stevie D of the Illbotz, and the Emerald Empire collaboration. Mustin and I have made no progress one our joint effort, but I have completed two new tracks for my solo album made from beats I stole years ago from Doctor Popular. I don’t have permission to use said beats, but I’m planning on doing some major Doc Pop seducing. My hip don’t lie, either.

In the background while I type this at 3:30am is the film Road Trip, wherein the main character films a lovely message to his out of town girlfriend… on VHS. Road Trip is already so old that middle school kids wouldn’t understand why Breken Meyer didn’t just Skype her. Kids who were born in 1990 can drink now. You feel old as shit now, don’t you? Have a great day!

The Adventures of Beef Thompson: Vampire Hunter

Art by Thor Thorvaldson

Hey all! My new album, The Adventures of Beef Thompson: Vampire Hunter, is now available free for download at beefy.bandcamp.com! All it costs is your e-mail address so that I can later tell you when my next album comes up. Also exclusive info, tracks, and show announcements. No spam. I don’t have anything to sell. Also, I’ll probably lose the list of e-mails in a month or two. So you really have nothing to lose! If you feel that my music is worth a couple bucks, I set up the name your price feature so you can throw in however much you think the album is worth. All proceeds will go towards making my next album, Too Big To Fail, as good as it can be. Mastering, physical CDs, maybe traveling funds for a show or two. The options or near limitless. I’m not doing a kickstarter or going on tour to drum up funds, so you can think of this as my hip-hop bake sale. But fear not if you love the album but don’t have the funds to spare. We’ve all been there. And if you haven’t, what’s it like to be the 1%? I bet it’s super nice. Big thanks to Adam Warrock and Hairetsu for featuring on tracks and thanks to Shael Riley, Klopfenpop, tanner4105, Snake Eyes, and Doc Pop for throwing it down on the musical side. Also a giant thanks to Thor Thorvaldson for providing the amazing album art! (Check out his DA link to find out what other awesome nerdcore rapper he’s working with). If you dig the album please tell your friends, tweet, facebook, blog about it, vidcast, all that stuff. Get the word out, because nothing is better than free music! If you hate the album… I don’t know. I guess make posts about how I suck and that you hate me and that MC __________ is better. That’ll show me!

Scott Armstrong
Bryan Kissel
Jared Curtis
Luke Douglas
Jimi Cullen
Jon Hydeman
Steven Holetz
Brian Felcher
Eric Ways
Zachary Pforter
Trina Talma
Robert Kern
Jon Hickey
Clifford Lang
Josh Maher
Charles Arnold
Sean Ward
Spencer Brown
Larry Fine
Austin Wentz
Shaun Hamson
Poverty Man
Brian Roberts
Trevor Brummitt
James Powell
Dennis Menard
Ross Butler
Christopher Lantz
Zachary Paul
Brian Augustine
Josh Gray
Brandalynn White
Aaron Shanahan
Marc Lulkin
Jehred Johnson
Paul Stein
Daniel Ryan
Tung Roberts
Joshua T Burnell
Murray Barnes
Grahm Eberhardt
David Dryburgh
Josh Keyoth
Robert Hopkins
Charles Walker
Mathew Irizarry
Jon Reddick
Brian Manley
Jonathan Holey
Kevin Newburn
Austin Rodger
Jake Wichrowski
Matthew Keener

If you would like an alias used or would like me to post a link to your site, just let me know via email, twitter, facebook, or leave a note in the paypal window!

Just Another Lazy Podcast – Episode 94 – Clopping

The JALP site has been down for quite some time, but McFly, McQueen, and I recorded a BRAND NEW EPISODE! OMG!!!! We recorded it a while ago, but for over a week Comcast wasn’t allowing me to upload anything at all. It was madness. So sit back and enjoy listening to three idiots tell you how to live your life! It’ll be like a Fox News morning show! Also happy birthday to MC Lars who’s song we continue to steal for the intro!


It’s been a long time since With Sprinkles came out. I remember uploading it late one night and annoying my girlfriend with every e-mail I received notifying that someone new had downloaded it. I miss that feeling and want it back! What’s stopping me? Me. Let’s go more into detail.
It seems that when I return to the computer in a “let’s make some musica!” mindset, I don’t just focus on one project. I dabble in many. So allow me to give you a lowdown of all the stuff I’ve got in the works. I’m not trying to convince you of my prolific capabilities mind you, but when projects are actually announced, it’s more likely that I will hold myself accountable. I used to do it all the time when I was younger and I thought I was a big fucking deal with my 30 fans. Good ol’ days. Now I have 40! Woo!

The Adventures of Beef Thompson: Vampire Hunter
This project is all but complete. It’s mostly just a collection of all the tracks I’ve put online in one form or another since With Sprinkles. Stuff like PAXXX, God Hates Fangs, Outlaw, and others. There are a couple new tracks as well, but production on one has been slow due to the swamped schedule of my friend and the other new track will require me to not suck as I attempt to finalize the track myself. As much as I like the title of “artist”, I hardly am one and have to finally, ya know, learn stuff. This project will be free for all and I keep hoping I’ll have it within the month. I’ve been saying it for months.

Untitled Project with Mustin
This project does in fact have a title, but it’s still under wraps. I tend to be a busy guy. I try to make nerd rhymes, I go to school, I have a job, and we have a kid. That can be time consuming. Mustin is in the exact same boat as I am (sans the school part I believe) so it’s understandable at this point why there hasn’t been more done on this. I have written a majority of the tracks and have done demos of a few of them, but nothing is set in stone. We’ve also been working within a concept, which has become rather challenging for me. I won’t come up with anything for weeks and months, then all of a sudden come up with something stellar (as far as I’m concerned). So the creative process on this one has been more annoying than usual. I can confirm though that the album is set to feature Zealous1, Adam Warrock, Random, and others that are awesome and that I love. It’s just a matter of getting all the pieces in motion.

New Grammar Club Album
It’s that time of year again, wherein Shael comes up with crazy wonderful ideas for tracks and I attempt to write raps to them. I want to say we already have about 4 or 5 demos in the works, with my words having been written fully for two of them so far. Our focus this go-round is to find a nice middle ground between the styles of our first album and our second. Less esoteric with more substance. Also we wanna get laid. And paid. Not necessarily in that order. As always, this project will be free for the masses unless I forget what Shael and I had talked about, which is entirely possible. If we do charge it’ll be super cheap and totally affordable. By then Obama should have given everyone a job and healthcare.

Too Big To Fail
This album is all me. I’ve “made” the beats and when I say “made” I mean I found the samples and mixed em all together. No relying on tanner or c64 or Doc Pop or Mustin to make a hot track for me to ruin with dumb raps. It’s all on me. Four tracks are completely written with roughly three more tracks on their way. With completely new production it should have a different feel from Sprinkles or Rolling Doubles, but it will still be good fun. It will cost dollars, but no more than $5. The proceeds of which go towards my rent and to people I owe money to. This makes me seem less like a charity case and more like a business man. In the event that it does well the money will go to finally making up some decent merch and maybe even some gas money to do some more shows and be able to finance it. Wouldn’t you love to see me on the road with Warrock or Lars or something like that next summer? I know I would. If nothing else I can get some better shirts to cover your midsection with. This album will discuss many things, including America, V-Cards, sleep, and the struggles of being a nerdcore rapper while still wanting Kabuto to like you. This album will also not feature other people’s raps*. I might steal people for choruses (I’m looking your way Klop. I’ll hit you up) but otherwise it’s all me. Awwww yeah!

So that’s the long and short of it. In personal news I started a new job. Due to the nature of the gig I can’t give out a whole shit-ton of details, but I’m working a graveyard shift a few nights a week which is going to allow me to get a lot of writing time in that would normally be used for sleeping. The hard part remains recording time, but maybe I’ll launch some kind of kickstarter to gain funds for studio time. I don’t know. Either way now you know music is coming. Also a podcast will be coming shortly once I can spend more than 15 minutes in front of my desktop. I’ve been playing a lot of Hanging with Friends on my phone, so if you’re playing too, hit me up. Also my Tiny Tower is no longer tiny. That’s just how I roll. I was on the west side the other weekend for VanFest 2011. The show was awesome as hell and the dudes and ladies who were there were a fantastic group of pros. The sound people were my favorite. You guys were crazy awesome and I look forward to VanFest 2012! While there I met up with Ultraklystron and we’re finally going to collab together on a couple tracks that have sick beats. I want to wish safe travels to mc chris, MC Lars, Adam Warrock, and Random as they continue their tour (I hear they’re in LA now) and I hope you all do the same and to also go to their shows and buy hella t-shirts. Thanks for your time. It’s 5am and I literally had nothing better to do than to write about myself. It’s like 2006 all over again, but with less forum drama and drunk Texans.

Love Beefy

*Unless I get lazy towards the end and ask Warrock to drop 16. I freakin’ love that guy.